FROM: Jay Friedkin
SUJECT: Re: Complaint
Hey Reception, if that is your real name. Wanna know who scheduled Indo-Malay right next to FreshGrounds? That would be me, Senior VP of Sales. Wanna know why? After that little hair-pulling incident, both sides increased their bids by 40%.
I'll explain, because your receptionist-level brain probably requires it. Those two sides are FIGHTING. And what do we sell? That's right, COMBAT MACHINES. We WANT them to hate each other. So they will try to fight each other with... what? That's right again, COMBAT MACHINES. Which they will pay us a lot of money for.
So I suggest you go back to serving coffee with a blank smile, and let me do my much-more-complicated job.
Thx a bunch,
Mr. Friedkin to you